Shattered Reflections

I woke with an epiphany of uncertainty and dissatisfaction I could not grasp. Back and forth, I stumbled on indecisive thoughts on what could be, should be and why? Why this striking realisation that life had suddenly seemed so unfamiliar. I had spent the last fifteen hours lying in bed as if I was paralysed; isolated and lost in a world of unspoken words. Contemplating, I had questioned my own thoughts, hoping to find even a small trace of harmony I once had. My self-reflections had suddenly drowned in an abundance of negativity that had taken over like a dim light in a never ending cave of darkness. Had this strange morning not come; I would have continued daily routines and managed to find insignificant reasons to open my eyes and remember what peace there may be in silence. Unfortunately, this morning had come. It had stricken me like rush of heavy wind, consistent and demanding attention. Lingering around my bed, forming a cage of destructive energy that restrained the beautiful thoughts I could no longer recollect. Determined to find answers, I broke free and staggered my way outside, hoping to find comfort in the morning air.

Heaving feet, growling stomach, cracked lips and bloodshot eyes, the morning light and cool breeze had failed to awaken me from my inner slumber. As I sat outside, getting lost in the vines that covered the old and broken fence around my suburban house, I wondered…  The world around me looks the same, but why had I come to believe that something is not right? A feeling of overwhelming possession still denies me a sense of satisfaction. I quickly brushed away the thoughts, forced myself to get dress and disguise the pain with strength I had left. I then began my journey of yet another day of conventional existing, captured in the game of routine.

Geraldton, a town of modest size but through time, had consumed more than it can handle. A town of very few secrets and yet, many mouths share whispers and talk. I had spent my youth ”living in the now” without a slight curiosity to what other way of life there may be beyond the long road that lead afar. Since the age of 13, I had ultimately fallen into the town’s venomous cycle of thrilling nights and broken dreams. Greed, manipulation and hidden agendas had consumed me. The town was small enough that I was acquainted with almost every lost soul, just as blinded and oblivious and as I.

As I made my way to the café where I had spent the last 4 years serving coffee, I caught my reflection against a shop mirror that make me stop and question; how have I come to be blindingly infatuated by the unscripted rules of society? My reflection had displayed an attractive young woman, face as pretty as makeup could present. Through hesitant eyes, it was a young girl convinced into a beautiful stray-jacket and yet screaming for freedom. Shivers raced down my spine as the sharp wind strikes; piercing its way through the gaps, instructing humanity to grasp their form.

As I made my way to the café where I had spent the last 4 years serving coffee, I caught my reflection against a shop mirror that make me stop and question; how have I come to be blindingly infatuated by the unscripted rules of society? My reflection had displayed an attractive young woman, face as pretty as makeup could present. Through hesitant eyes, it was a young girl convinced into a beautiful stray-jacket and yet screaming for freedom. Shivers raced down my spine as the sharp wind strikes; piercing its way through the gaps, instructing humanity to grasp their form.

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